I catch you staring at me and I shyly smile back at you but
I don’t let our eyes lock , just not
long enough for you to know me, Just enough to let you see my beautiful almond
shaped eyes and maybe let you feel the intensity
in which they can pierce .I see you like what you see and you hope to like what
you get to know .There’s a lot more you know
I’d like to think I am mysterious ;-) …not
always to me though, you see sometimes I feel like an open book, an unprotected
document for people to read what they perceive , and
write what they conclude .Oh well… but that’s only sometimes, it happens to the
best of us I guess! But to you I can be mysterious, if that’s what you like.
But I promise you my mind is mysterious, Lol (hides face in
palms) ….oh yes that am sure, even I get intrigued by it. It’s never quiet up here;
to be honest I think I talk more in my mind than I would to you. Am still
trying to tame my imaginations hmm…. But am thinking it’s good to live a little on the wild side. I create my own tiny world, where I am in charge, am the boss
.I will let you in once in a while, you will love the adventure, I promise. I
hope my mind will not overpower you.
I used to be afraid of height; I still am, but heck…. How else
can one live life if not sky high, like a kite up high…hahahaha. If I was to compare
myself to an animal, I would be a Gazelle. I really don’t know why, I just
think I move like one. Calm in nature but a force to reckon with …that is if
you want to make me your prey(hides face again)!I Will laugh at most of your
Jokes…I promise.
I know you feel it, my heart pounding, it gets intense
sometimes. Av been told I am very transparent….. I've tried to hide my emotions,
not to be too emotional and boy did it change me. I did not want to show pain, I was afraid to
express my fears; no I could not allow them to see distress, I did not want to
hear what unfortunately we are labelled….. ‘Nags’. Sadly it changed me! It
changed me so much that I did not know how to relate with my emotions, I lost
the authenticity of my soul. I wasn't sure
if I was loving or being clingy, I was afraid to give more than was asked
because maybe it would be too much….Its not fun just doing your duty. Wow…breath
in breath out. It’s a good sign though, the fact that you feel the pounding,
the heartbeat. maybe you have the power to bring it all rushing back. I think
some of us were just created to feel it all, the good the bad. And wouldn't you
love that, no walls, no barriers, nothing in between, just pure and true
emotions, just imagine ,pure infusion of souls.
But I still get afraid; you will know when I feel it, that
part I can never hide. Just know that when I do ,I will run to you not away
from you, so don’t turn me down, don’t look away .Just hold me, Because all that I
crave is the security in your embrace, just the illusion of you building a fortress
around me. Don’t scold me because am in a panic, just don’t let me go through it
alone and I promise you that I will never let you face fear alone, If you
let me.
Would you help me find me…. I will help you. I was created
to do that, I am your helper. I promise you no one dull moment. I have been told I am too spirited, I hope you don’t mind
that.
Always
Luv- Ish
should i mail you
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